If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.
If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.
If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.
If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.
If children live with ridicule, they learn to be shy.
If children live with jealousy, they learn what envy is.
If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.
If children live with tolerance, they learn to be patient.
If children live with encouragement, they learn to be confident.
If children live with praise, they learn to appreciate.
If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.
If children live with acceptance, they learn to find love in the world.
If children live with recognition, they learn to have a goal.
If children live with sharing, they learn to be generous.
If children live with honesty and fairness, they learn what truth and justice are.
If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those around them.
If children live with friendliness, they learn that the world is a nice place in which to live.
If children live with serenity, they learn to have peace of mind.
With what are your children living?
-Dorothy L. Nolte
Saturday, December 12, 2009
My Kindergartner Is a "Slow Poke"???
Recently I have was informed and appalled that my child was being called a "slowpoke" at school. Hmmm....the child is five,the child is male, and the child is a kindergartner. Apparently he is not finishing his assignments during classroom time. Is he displaying bad behavior by distracting other children, is he being inattentive, is he daydreaming?
NO! He is doing the best he can, but he is just a little slow at completing his work. Now, what is more upsetting is what I have found out what form of motivation "tactics" his teachers were using to get him going. He was not given snack during snack time unless he had completed his assignment, he was to stay in the cafeteria after lunchtime instead of going to recess, and he had to move his name to "yellow" or "red" ( yellow is the warning of "bad behavior" and red referring to "bad behavior" after the child has moved his name to yellow. Oh, and let's not forget that he is being told he will not be able to participate in the Christmas party unless his school work is completed. Absorb all of that and then, remember: 5 years old, male, kindergarten.
What has our education system come to when they are depriving children of food and much needed playtime during recess? And let's not forget about resulting into name calling! You know, it broke my heart when my 5 year old child broke down into tears one morning and told me he was a slow poke and would never be able to finish his work because of his teacher's and classmates' name calling. He feels like a complete failure and has low self esteem about himself. And this is a coming from a child who is a smart and bright child who had complete confidence in himself. Last year he loved school, and this year, he doesn't want to have anything to do with it! What is happening here?
I'll tell you what's happening. Kindergartners are now under intense pressure to meet inappropriate expectations, including academic standards, that until recently, were reserved for first or second grade. These expectations and the policies that result from them have greatly reduced and in some cases obliterated opportunities for imaginative child-initiated play in kindergarten. Research shows that children who engage in complex
forms of socio-dramatic play have greater language skills than non-players, better social skills, more empathy, more imagination, and more of the subtle capacity to know what others mean. They are less aggressive and show more self-control and higher levels of thinking (Alliance for Childhood, p. 7). Yet, the curriculum has been revamped and has had children behind desks with pencil and paper in hand for the past 15 years. What happened to play? What happened to learning and having fun? What happened to all of the "learning centers"? There's nothing but worksheets after worksheets after worksheets.
Yeah, he's a boy. A team of twelve neuroscientists found that the various regions of the brain develop in a different sequence and tempo in girls compared with boys, resulting that the pace of the girls’ development is two years ahead of the boys’ (Sax, 2007). For many boys, there is a huge difference of readiness to learn between the age of five and seven, just as there is a huge difference in readiness for a girl between three and five.
So, why the reprimanding and demeaning and degrading name calling if my slowpoke child is a perfectly NORMAL, five year old boy?
NO! He is doing the best he can, but he is just a little slow at completing his work. Now, what is more upsetting is what I have found out what form of motivation "tactics" his teachers were using to get him going. He was not given snack during snack time unless he had completed his assignment, he was to stay in the cafeteria after lunchtime instead of going to recess, and he had to move his name to "yellow" or "red" ( yellow is the warning of "bad behavior" and red referring to "bad behavior" after the child has moved his name to yellow. Oh, and let's not forget that he is being told he will not be able to participate in the Christmas party unless his school work is completed. Absorb all of that and then, remember: 5 years old, male, kindergarten.
What has our education system come to when they are depriving children of food and much needed playtime during recess? And let's not forget about resulting into name calling! You know, it broke my heart when my 5 year old child broke down into tears one morning and told me he was a slow poke and would never be able to finish his work because of his teacher's and classmates' name calling. He feels like a complete failure and has low self esteem about himself. And this is a coming from a child who is a smart and bright child who had complete confidence in himself. Last year he loved school, and this year, he doesn't want to have anything to do with it! What is happening here?
I'll tell you what's happening. Kindergartners are now under intense pressure to meet inappropriate expectations, including academic standards, that until recently, were reserved for first or second grade. These expectations and the policies that result from them have greatly reduced and in some cases obliterated opportunities for imaginative child-initiated play in kindergarten. Research shows that children who engage in complex
forms of socio-dramatic play have greater language skills than non-players, better social skills, more empathy, more imagination, and more of the subtle capacity to know what others mean. They are less aggressive and show more self-control and higher levels of thinking (Alliance for Childhood, p. 7). Yet, the curriculum has been revamped and has had children behind desks with pencil and paper in hand for the past 15 years. What happened to play? What happened to learning and having fun? What happened to all of the "learning centers"? There's nothing but worksheets after worksheets after worksheets.
Yeah, he's a boy. A team of twelve neuroscientists found that the various regions of the brain develop in a different sequence and tempo in girls compared with boys, resulting that the pace of the girls’ development is two years ahead of the boys’ (Sax, 2007). For many boys, there is a huge difference of readiness to learn between the age of five and seven, just as there is a huge difference in readiness for a girl between three and five.
So, why the reprimanding and demeaning and degrading name calling if my slowpoke child is a perfectly NORMAL, five year old boy?
Friday, December 11, 2009
All they need is love...
If I Had my Child to Raise Over Again -Diane Loomans
If I had my child to raise over again
I'd build self-esteem first and the house later
I'd finger paint more and point the finger less
I would do less correcting and more connecting
I'd take my eyes off my watch and watch with my eyes
I would care to know less and know to care more
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites
I'd stop playing serious and seriously play
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars
I'd do more hugging and less tugging
I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often
I would be firm less often and affirm much more
I'd model less about the love of power
And more about the power of love.
If I had my child to raise over again
I'd build self-esteem first and the house later
I'd finger paint more and point the finger less
I would do less correcting and more connecting
I'd take my eyes off my watch and watch with my eyes
I would care to know less and know to care more
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites
I'd stop playing serious and seriously play
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars
I'd do more hugging and less tugging
I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often
I would be firm less often and affirm much more
I'd model less about the love of power
And more about the power of love.
What kids are eating at school...Junk with a capital J
Holy cow! I went to my kids cafeteria this afternoon, and I couldn't believe what these kids were eating! Not from the cafeteria but the kids who bring lunch from home. Mcdonald's-coke, fries, nuggets, chocolate Ho-ho's, fruit roll-ups, Capri Suns, choclate pudding, chips and more chips, gummy snacks, processed cheese,cookies...need I say more? I mean, heck, I developed diabetes just watching these kids eat this stuff. It has been proven over and over again that all this junk affects children's behaviors and health. At first, parents were blaming the snack and soda vending machines at the schools. Okay, so those were taken out. But wait a minute, these kids are still eating junk. Hmmm... who are the parents going to blame now?!?!?
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Do I have ADHD?
School is buckling down, and I can't concentrate between taking care of the household and family, studying, shuttling kids to soccer, CCD, or piano. I'm running on coffee, and I feel like my mind is going to explode. My husband is out of town, and I feel like I'm running around in circles. Do I have ADHD...
Friday, December 4, 2009
ADHD Medication -Related Deaths in Children
Leanne M. Bessner, age 15 was prescribed Concerta and was taking it for only 2 months. She committed suicide on 10/09/2005 by hanging herself.
10-Year-Old Shaina Louise Dunkle
Diagnosed with ADHD by her school psychologist. Shaina's Death was caused from the Desipramine used to treat ADHD.
11-Year-Old Stephanie HallStephanie's School teacher suggested that she be tested for ADD. Stephanie's Death was caused From the Ritalin used to treat ADHD.
Adrian David Wade was born on November 09, 1991 12-year-old committed suicide on October 23, 2004. He was on 60mgs of Strattera daily. He was on it less then 4 months. His dx's were ADHD.
14-Year-Old Matthew Smith
Diagnosed with ADHD by his school psychologist. Matthew's Death was caused From from the Ritalin used to control his behavior.
Kiddie Cocaine
Ritalin affects children the same way cocaine affects adults...
- drug addiction
- nervousness and insomnia
- loss of appetite
- nausea and vomiting
- dizziness
- headaches
- changes in heart rate and blood pressure (usually elevation of both, but occasionally depression)
- skin rashes and itching
- abdominal pain
- weight loss
- digestive problems
- toxic psychosis
- psychotic episodes
- severe depression upon withdrawal
Uncle Buck and conference with the assistant principal
ADHD or too much pressure from schools?
Assistant Principal at Maizy's school:
"I've been an educator
for years...
and in that time,
I've seen a lot of bad eggs.
I say ''eggs'' because
at the elementary level...
we are not dealing
with fully-developed individuals.
I see a bad egg
when I look at your niece.
She is a twiddler, a dreamer...
a silly heart
and she is a jabberbox.
And, frankly...
I don't think she takes a thing...
in her life or her career
as a student seriously."
Assistant Principal at Maizy's school:
"I've been an educator
for years...
and in that time,
I've seen a lot of bad eggs.
I say ''eggs'' because
at the elementary level...
we are not dealing
with fully-developed individuals.
I see a bad egg
when I look at your niece.
She is a twiddler, a dreamer...
a silly heart
and she is a jabberbox.
And, frankly...
I don't think she takes a thing...
in her life or her career
as a student seriously."
The ADHD Child’s Bill Of Rights
This was an interesting poem I came across. As I was reading this poem, I thought to myself,"Shouldn't this be named The Child's Bill of Rights?"
“Help me to focus”
“Please teach me through my sense of “touch”.
I need “hands on” and “body movement”.
“I need to know what comes next”
Please give me a structured environment where there is a dependable routine.
Give me an advanced warning if there will be changes.
“Wait for me, I’m still thinking”
Please allow me to go at my own pace.
If I rush, I get confused and upset.
“I’m stuck ! I cant do it !”
Please offer me options for problem-solving.
I need to know the detours when the road is blocked.
“Is it right? I need to know NOW!”
Please give me rich and immediate feedback on how I’m doing.
“I didn’t forget, I didn’t ‘hear’ it in the first place!”
Please give me directions one step at a time and ask me to
say back what I think you said.
“I didn’t know I Wasn’t in my seat!”
“Please remind me to STOP, THINK and ACT.”
Am I almost done now?
Please give me short work periods with short-term goals.
“What?”
Please don’t say “I’ve already told you that”.
Tell me again in different words.
Give me a signal. Draw me a symbol.
“I know, it’s ALL wrong, isn’t it?”
Please give me praise for partial success.
Reward me for self-improvement, not just for perfection.
“But why do I always get yelled at?”
Please catch me doing something right and praise me for my specific positive behavior.
Remind me (and yourself) about my good points, when I’m having a bad day.
“I may be hard to live with, and have ADHD, but I still have
feelings and would have never chosen to behave like I do
sometimes”.
Author Unknown
“Help me to focus”
“Please teach me through my sense of “touch”.
I need “hands on” and “body movement”.
“I need to know what comes next”
Please give me a structured environment where there is a dependable routine.
Give me an advanced warning if there will be changes.
“Wait for me, I’m still thinking”
Please allow me to go at my own pace.
If I rush, I get confused and upset.
“I’m stuck ! I cant do it !”
Please offer me options for problem-solving.
I need to know the detours when the road is blocked.
“Is it right? I need to know NOW!”
Please give me rich and immediate feedback on how I’m doing.
“I didn’t forget, I didn’t ‘hear’ it in the first place!”
Please give me directions one step at a time and ask me to
say back what I think you said.
“I didn’t know I Wasn’t in my seat!”
“Please remind me to STOP, THINK and ACT.”
Am I almost done now?
Please give me short work periods with short-term goals.
“What?”
Please don’t say “I’ve already told you that”.
Tell me again in different words.
Give me a signal. Draw me a symbol.
“I know, it’s ALL wrong, isn’t it?”
Please give me praise for partial success.
Reward me for self-improvement, not just for perfection.
“But why do I always get yelled at?”
Please catch me doing something right and praise me for my specific positive behavior.
Remind me (and yourself) about my good points, when I’m having a bad day.
“I may be hard to live with, and have ADHD, but I still have
feelings and would have never chosen to behave like I do
sometimes”.
Author Unknown
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Parent/Teacher Conferences
Wow!! Great conferences with both of my kid's teachers! Something that struck me quite interesting was this: My son's teacher said, "Patrick is doing great!" I responded, "Well,that's good, but as far as behavior, he's almost always moving his name to the 'red' because he doesn't listen or takes too long to do his homework or wanders around when it's time to sit and work." I was so happy when his teacher started off by saying, "He is a normal, five year old boy. He is supposed to act this way..." WOW!!! Thank you, Lord!!! I wish there were many more teachers like her who have the patience and understanding of children behavior because so many put their "red alert ADHD hats" on.
The majority of ADHD patients are young boys. If you have a chance, read "Boys Adrift" and "Gender Matters" by Leonard Sax,M.D.,Ph.D.He explains how "the world has created an environment that is literally toxic to boys" Thus, leading into the often misdiagnosis of ADHD and over prescription of medications.
The majority of ADHD patients are young boys. If you have a chance, read "Boys Adrift" and "Gender Matters" by Leonard Sax,M.D.,Ph.D.He explains how "the world has created an environment that is literally toxic to boys" Thus, leading into the often misdiagnosis of ADHD and over prescription of medications.
Fight Against Psychotropic Drugs
Please take the time to view this website:
www.ritalindeath.com
www.ritalindeath.com
April 15, 2001 this website was created in hopes of providing parents and guardians with information about the truth behind ADHD and the drugs used to treat children diagnosed with ADD or ADHD.
This website was built because parents didn't want other children to die or suffer side effects because of their parents lack of knowledge.
Monday, October 12, 2009
You Are What You Eat
The issue of whether food additives, such as artificial coloring and preservatives, affect children's behavior has long been controversial. Children’s way of eating has changed significantly throughout the years. Most children eat far too many fatty, salty, and sugary foods-from burgers, fries, cheese, and ice cream to soft drinks, potato chips, and candy. Few children get the vitamins, minerals, fiber, and phytochemicals (beta-carotenes that occur naturally from plants) they need from fruits, vegetables, and whole grains.
In the UK, the European Food Standards Agency (FSA), called for a ban of six artificial additives found in foods, such as, brightly colored frostings used on cakes, soft drinks, and candies. Parents complained of adverse reactions, such as, hyperactivity and mood volatility in their children directly after consumption of these types of food. According to a study performed by Southampton University, it was found that there was a link between hyperactivity and the artificial colorings and preservatives in 750,000 individuals (Freer, 2009). The study found that these artificial additives caused primary school children to become distracted and hyper, which resulted in failing a computer attention test.
You might want to think about changing your child's diet before medical professionals diagnose your child with ADHD and place them under harmful medications...
Reference
Freer, Peter. (2008). ADHD and Food Additives: European Food Standards Agency Call For Bans Six Artificial Colors. Retrieved October 10, 2009 from http://playattention.com/attention-deficit/articles/category/adhd-food-colors/.
In the UK, the European Food Standards Agency (FSA), called for a ban of six artificial additives found in foods, such as, brightly colored frostings used on cakes, soft drinks, and candies. Parents complained of adverse reactions, such as, hyperactivity and mood volatility in their children directly after consumption of these types of food. According to a study performed by Southampton University, it was found that there was a link between hyperactivity and the artificial colorings and preservatives in 750,000 individuals (Freer, 2009). The study found that these artificial additives caused primary school children to become distracted and hyper, which resulted in failing a computer attention test.
You might want to think about changing your child's diet before medical professionals diagnose your child with ADHD and place them under harmful medications...
Reference
Freer, Peter. (2008). ADHD and Food Additives: European Food Standards Agency Call For Bans Six Artificial Colors. Retrieved October 10, 2009 from http://playattention.com/attention-deficit/articles/category/adhd-food-colors/.
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